Maybe you're the type of person who reads a self-help book every now and again, when you recognize the need for change.
Maybe you're the type of person who takes to self-help books like fish to water, and can't seem to get enough.
Either way, there's a real risk in reading too many self-help books.
It's a multi-billion dollar industry that some claim profits off of our desire to perceive change without providing real change. And while mindfulness, meditation, gratitude, and self-compassion are scientifically validated ways to create change, other "self-help" techniques, such as affirmations, are being empirically questioned, and others, such as crystals, and law of attraction, have no scientific backing.
The quick and dirty: We recognize our lives could be happier, healthier, and more fulfilling, and we want quick fixes. Self-help books are miracle solutions!
By treating self-help books like miracle solutions, we're setting ourselves up for failure. By assuming that Information + Motivation = Change, we're missing out on some of the crucial aspects involved in true change: belief systems, competing commitments, habits, and routines. And in the process, we're creating ideals that will not serve us, and experiencing a sense of achievement just from reading about the change that could take place, resulting in what we call "spiritual entertainment."
If you find yourself reading books and putting them back on the shelf, along with all of the ideas inside, you're falling prey to spiritual entertainment.
We know this doesn't work. We deserve better. We need to step up and do the work that needs to be done to be the change we want to see in ourselves and in our world.
We know that truly loving ourselves and living our best lives is going to require more than "treat yo self" manicures and "self care Sunday" sundaes for dinner. We need to treat ourselves with respect and compassion always and participate in self-care every day so that we can experience true self-love: the quality of being that comes as a result of embracing true self care.
Our theory of action:
1. Love the life you have while creating the life of your dreams. Practice gratitude. Practice self-compassion. Create awareness around the positive in your life.
2. Set goals. Know what you want and why you want it. Balance a brazen, audacious vision with specific, measurable outcomes for how you want to be, feel, and think.
3. Learn. Read. Understand the science. Interview individuals who wrote the book and have made the change. Gather the information you need.
4. Do. Make the change. Cultivate daily habits and practices. Commit to change, engage in change. Do the damn thing.
4. Reflect. Study yourself. Track your progress. What's working? What's not? Why? What competing commitments or values are standing in the way?
5. Get help. Still aren't seeing the progress you hoped for? Phone a friend, or call a professional. Speak with another human. We have licensed coaches on call to help.
5. Cultivate connection. The antidote to shame. Connect with our community of mindfulness-practicing, self-awareness-seeking women. Share trip-ups and triumphs together. You're not alone, and you're definitely not the only one feeling this way. (Not a member? We have a group for you, too!)
How we do it:
Each essentials kit contains a great self-help book, a workbook that our resident educator, coaches, and experts have created to help you set goals, track progress, and reflect, access to our monthly webinars, Author Q&As, Beyond the Book group discussions, and our courageous community.
The deluxe self-care box comes with all of the above, plus 3-5 self-care items that are thoughtfully curated to help you achieve your goals, and a complimentary 30-minute one-on-one coaching session with a licensed professional.
We look for two qualities in our books: 1) Books that are based on research and are grounded in scientific studies, and 2) books that we can make actionable.
If you're ready to be the change you want to see, take the actions you need to take, do the work, and connect with a group of women who are committed to truly living their best lives, we're here for you.